Hmm.. I figured that I wouldn't have as much trouble getting my thoughts across on this blog by now. Yesterday's entry took nearly two hours to write. Who knows how long I'll be on this one. Writing has never been one of my strengths and probably never will be. But I'm making an effort everyday to write whatever's on my mind and to make progress. Even after my 90 posts, I think that I will keep this blog and continue to contribute onto it. That way, I will continue this learning process seeing as I feel I have much to gain from this experience.
Come to think of it, I've never been good at speaking either. Sometimes, I tend to look at people and find it amazing how effortlessly they can talk without pausing. That's always been one of my weaknesses. I would say one thing and then have to pause in order to get my thoughts straight so that I add onto what I was saying. I'm serious. Well, I guess this may be due to the fact that I never really communicated with others when I was younger. I remember that I used to try to talk with my classmates when I was in 3rd grade, but would always get ignored. Sometimes, my classmates would tell me to shut up because I would always talk about video games or cartoons that the other kids weren't interested in. At first, I thought it was just a joke, but then my classmates started shunning me so I took "shut up" as a literal context. And for the next several years, I would talk to no one. I still talked when I had to, but didn't openly talk with anyone at school whatsoever. There was an instance where my 6th grade teacher called on me to answer a question, but I would not answer. And so, I got detention for that. My 6th grade teacher was real mean too. I don't think she had another expression on her face other than "pissed-off mode."
This process of not talking with anyone carried over to high school too. My 10th grade English teacher thought I had problems because I always sat in the corner and put my head down when the other students conversed with each other. Now that I look back, yeah, I kinda did have a problem. I remembered that I didn't like any of my classmates from my high school. Everyone would always annoy me because they would talk about their boyfriends/girlfriends and how they liked sports which never interested me. Also, I was an honor student in high school and was the only minority in my classes. At first, I had the BoTD on them, but later found out that they were in fact racist towards Mexicans. (@#*&#@&#*@#)
Now that I'm in college, I don't face that problem. The being shunned and being with racist pricks problem. From day one, I made the decision that I would try to befriend people and become part of student organizations and go to as many events as I could. The complete opposite of my high school life XDD. I am glad though. College actually has other people that share my interests. The classmates from high school didn't. Not at all. Eww.
But now that I'm in college, I've become part of clubs such as: Club Japan, Japanese Animation Society, Comic Book Club, Urban Gaming League, Electronic Gaming League, Asian American Student Association, and other minor ones. I always look forward to events such as: local concerts, documentary films, Late Night, Role Playing with friends, and whatever else my friends and I decide to do. Sometimes we even do study sessions in the library.
Dang, this post took about an hour and a half. Gah!
Yeah, I was a lot like that back in school too, as hard as that is to believe.
ReplyDeleteI can talk rather effortlessly now because I have to do it nearly every single day, unlike before where I hardly ever did except at home.
College is where one's real personality really shines and it builds a lot of character, I think.